It’s about time some one has written an article about how to defend yourself against vicious monkeys. There have been too many close calls in the past year to let this unchecked aggression continue. Just this week Monkeys made an attempt to over throw the government of New Dehli, India by assassinating the Deputy Mayor. This monkey rebellion in India goes much further.

Over 10,000 monkeys have taken to the streets and government buildings, attacking citizens and destroying government records. These monkeys are getting more brazen with time. From 2001:

At least 10,000 monkeys are creating havoc in the Indian capital by barging into government offices, stealing food, threatening bureaucrats and even ripping apart valuable documents.

Why are monkeys threatening bureaucrats?